I grew up on the island of Kaua'i with my three siblings and parents. We were a part of a worldwide, fundamentalist religious group called Jehovah's Witnesses. My mother and father both parented me the best they could, but they came from a place of their own wounds and generational trauma. My siblings and I experienced emotional neglect and various forms of abuse.

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At the young age of 14, I dedicated my life to this religion. The consequences of that decision were incomprehensible for my young mind, for if I ever changed my mind and left, I would be disassociated and shunned from the only community I knew. However, the religious community felt hypocritical to me from an early age - claiming that they are a religion of love and peace, yet their love was conditional and tough. 

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The following four years, I led an incongruent life, trying my best to fit into boxes assigned to me. First as a godly preacher girl, then as the party girl. I abused substances, my body, and my spirit. I disassociated from and disregarded any true versions of myself, either to protect myself or others from pain. I didn't know who I was and was not given an environment to discover myself. I was truly in survival mode. A sense of safety was the last thing I felt in my body.

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At age 18, I decided to go back to the Jehovah's Witness religion. I hoped I would find a sense of peace and safety in my mind and body. I gave it a good shot, studying and immersing myself in its teachings, only to finally comprehend that this truly was not the way I wanted to live. ​​So at 21, I willingly exited the religion. I left behind family, lifelong friends and some semblance of a safety net. My chosen life was just about to start.​